mirrormirror

Go Fug Your Room: Nina Garcia’s New York Apartment

 

This month Architectural Digest is featuring the Upper East Side apartment of legendary fashion editor and US Project Runway judge Nina Garcia.

Which I was very much expecting to like as I enjoy her personal style very much (check out Sirs T and Lo’s ‘Judging the Judges’ columns for some examples). 

 

 

And at first I thought I did. The light airiness of the apartment itself is lovely and the colour scheme seemed refreshing and unusual.

 

 

But oh, Nina, Nina.  The more I looked at it I realised that I didn’t really like it at all. The colour story is only interesting because the stylist brought in some hot pink flowers and green leaves.  Look more closely and you’ll see that it’s a rather bland combination of white, grey, terracotta and camel, with some powder blue accents.

It also all seems rather uptight and uncomfortable – I think due to the lack of personal items beyond busts and artwork, and the spiky, brittle, skinny, fashion model legs on nearly every single piece of furniture. These are chairs and sofas made for perching, not for cosy snuggling.

The stone bust, vase and fireplace surround also seem rather hard and unfriendly, while the hideous carpet in the dining room, which admittedly is one of the few things with any personality in the entire apartment, looks like some fiendishly complicated children’s board game.

 

 

This is apparently the apartment that Nina shares with her young family, and though I’m a great believer in keeping some spaces free of kid stuff, the fact that there is no trace of them in any of the rooms on show – no photos, kid art, toys, clothes or kid-friendly furniture -  seems a little sad. Or perhaps they’re occasionally permitted to play on the dining room carpet when their mother isn’t looking.

All in all the whole ambience just seems too controlled and impersonal, with any hint of quirkiness, personality, warmth, exuberance or life, expertly stifled by layer upon layer of expensive ‘good taste’.  But heck what do I know.

 

 

The closet, on the other hand, is completely and utterly to die for.

 

 

What do you chaps think?

 

poll by twiigs.com

 

By the way, for those of you who don’t yet subscribe, Nina gives FABULOUS fashion Pinterest.

 

Go Fug Your Kitchen: Sophie Conran’s Bayswater Flat

 

Sophie Conran is yet another child of British design royalty Sir Terence and his second wife cookery writer Caroline Conran.  Sophie is maybe not quite as famous as her brothers Jasper and Sebastian (whose Notting Hill house has already had the honour of featuring in GFYR) but still has serious design chops as the designer behind the Sophie Conran for Portmeirion dinnerware and a newish range of wallpapers for Arthouse among many other food and product collaborations.

Her Bayswater flat is not really interesting enough for a whole Go Fug Your Room, as most of it is blandly inoffensive and seems to have come straight out of the pages of ‘Fuck Your Noguchi Coffee Table’.

 

 

Collection of mis-matched white jugs. CHECK.

 

 

Collection of mismatched white vases. CHECK.

 

 

Saarinen Tulip Chair. CHECK

 

 

Arco Lamp AND Arne Jacobsen Series 7 Chairs. CHECK and CHECK.

 

 

Saarinen Tulip Chairs and Tulip Table. CHECK and CHECK.

Utterly hideous pink walls. CHECK. 

Er, excuse me?

Apparently Ms Conran let her daughter chose the wall colour, an evil which has been compounded by picking out the ornate mouldings in stark white, making the whole thing look like a particularly tasteless wedding cake.

So, in the run up to Mother’s Day, I’d like to ask the delightful mirrormirror commentariat two simple questions.  Is this kitchen fugly and should kids ever be allowed to make décor decision not immediately pertaining to their own bedrooms?

poll by twiigs.com

In previous Go Fug Your Room news, around 30% of you liked Adam Levine’s house (and weren’t influenced in any way, shape or form by his cute smile. No sirree). Around 30% of you thought it was fugly and 40% of you were meh on the whole thing.

Go Fug Your Room? - Ines de la Fressange in Provence

 

Does that title send shivers down your spine?  

Given that Ines de la Fressange is the person I’d most like to be when I grow up, and Provence is the place in the world that I’d most to live (yeah, how original am I ), and her apartment in Paris has already been given the coveted mirrormirror seal of approval,  I can’t express how excited I was to see that my Elle Décor international edition was featuring Ines’ house in Provence.

Until that is I actually opened the magazine. Was this cold, spare, almost industrial, snoozefest of a space REALLY the home of the most stylish woman on the planet?  Or has my beloved Ines been kidnapped by space aliens and replaced by some sort of robot?

 

 

My first issue is with all the white.  I spent one of the happiest years of my life living in the South of France and the light there is warm and golden and oozes like butter, made for the sunset colours of painted plaster, terracotta tiles and warm, rich woods.  This harsh, clinical whiteness might work in Scandinavia, or Britain, or even Paris, but it doesn’t begin to say Provence to me.

 

 

And then there are the chairs.  Is it me, or does every single chair with the exception of the daybed look supremely uncomfortable? Either the sort of chair you have to perch on or a somewhat creaky flea market sofa with the sort of smelly upholstery you have to cover with a throw?

 

 

I could almost cope with the white if it had been enlivened by some brilliantly contrasting colours, but black?  I think black is quite difficult to live with at the best of times, but the black and white, with the stiff metallic lamps and stark, shiny floors, just seems cold, uncomfortable and unfriendly in Provence.  And I can’t even begin to explain how many sorts of wrong the depressingly coloured Union Jack cushion is.

 

 

The kitchen is by far the best room in the house and shows what might have been if more colour had been included.  But it still all seems rather brutal to me.

 

 

But what do you guys think?  Is this house fugly or not? As usual tell us how you reached your decision in the comments.

 

poll by twiigs.com

 

I was astonished to find out that an amazing 74% of you agreed with me about Diane von Furstenburg’s Manhattan penthouse. I do hope you’re not just sucking up. 

Go Fug Your Room? – DvF’s Manhattan Penthouse

 

I hugely admire Diane von Furstenberg’s fashion style and her inspired use of prints and colours, even though, as I don’t have much of a waist, her iconic wrap dress is just not flattering on me.

So I was fascinated to see online previews of a spread in March’s Architectural Digest featuring her incredible penthouse apartment in Manhattan’s Meatpacking District.

 

 

The penthouse, built over DvF’s design studio and flagship store, is absolutely stunning, with apparently incredible views through its transparent glass walls.

 

 

But inside? Well, it all strikes me as just a bit too MUCH.

 

 

Those chairs are gorgeous, the art is apparently priceless, but it all feels as if it just can’t breathe. The backdrop of the leopard skin rug really doesn’t help matters.  And who sticks art, however exquisite, on the windowsill, thereby obscuring the billion-dollar views?

 

 

I love the Andy Warhol portrait, dislike  the table and am meh on the clashing animal prints. Again, I think this would have looked a whole lot better with a more neutral rug.

 

 

I sort of admire her for attempting to recreate a pasha’s boudoir in her big glass eyrie -  just because the structure is ultra-modern, you don’t necessarily have to go ultra-modern with the décor. But I just don’t think this works, the attempted grandeur is overwhelmed by the ceiling and it just looks incongruous.

 

 

Those screens round the bath are lovely, as is the bathtub itself, but I would be terrified of knocking over all those little tables and stools when I emerged dripping wet from my ablutions.  But maybe DVF is not as clumsy as me.

Although I can see that one would want to create private areas in such an open space, overall all the clutter and clashing patterns and different styles and objets seems to fight with the open space rather than celebrating it.  She’s tried to make it cosy, but I don’t think it’s the sort of space that works with cosy.

But what do I know?  She’s is DvF after all.

What do you think? Please show your workings in the comments.

poll by twiigs.com

Scary Things In Bedrooms

 

Remember when I posted this nightmare-inducing room from MyHotel in Brighton earlier this year? 

 

 

Well, I was reminded of it yesterday when I caught a glimpse of the nursery Christina Aguilera had decorated for her son Max. (I know this is old, but I didn’t see it when it came out).

 

 

That child is going to need years of therapy.  Is this a trend?

Go Fug Your Showhouse – Elle Decor

 

Elle Decor recently created its first showhouse in a San Francisco suburb – working with ten different Bay Area interior designers to ‘turn a classic 1920s Mediterranean-style home into a showcase for contemporary style’.

 

That’s some beautiful house isn’t it? Unfortunately these designers seemingly run the gamut of decorating styles from boringly humdrum, via fussy and old fashioned through to suicidally depressing, and managed to transform the house into something not only monstrously ugly, but, to my eye at least, not remotely representative of San Francisco style.

I’m really interested to here what Bay Area peeps in particular think of this. 

 

 

The living room was created by Gary Spain, and all the heavy, gloomy clutter, weird artifacts and strange cross-cultural references makes it look like a junk room at the British Museum.  And those dark wing-backed chairs would make even the Dowager Duchess of Downton uncomfortable.  In fact the whole thing looks about as relaxing as a dentist’s waiting room. Like the black fireplace though.

 

 

The TV watching area of Erin Martin’s media room below at least has some wow factor – I like the screen and that curved chair -  but all the darkness is making me want to switch on my lightbox.  Does all the black really say San Francisco to you?

 

 

The other end of the room with its huge spider (is that what it’s supposed to be?) light fitting  and hideously uncomfortable seating area and mirrored fireplace is, however, the stuff of nightmares.

 

 

If the unremitting terror and gloom is getting too much then you can always escape to Will Wick’s library. Except that is probably the most scarily gloomy and depressing room of all. AND it has a zebra-stripe rug. Seriously didn’t that decorating ship sail a very long time ago?  But no matter, it also features a helpful saw thingy in an alcove, making it super easy to kill yourself, or at the very least add authenticity to games of Cluedo.

 

 

Steven Volpe’s dining room is another unremittingly cheerful place – you can just hear the stylist yelling for ‘oranges’, ‘maple leaves’ ‘ANYTHING’  to relieve the gloom.  But at least you know that extra light bulbs would make a thoughtful hostess gift.

 

 

The house’s vampires should avoid the breakfast nook decorated by Palmer Weiss, as here at least the sun is visible and the chairs are lovely.  But the birdcage light, ferns on columns and busy curtains make this look contemporary to 1911 rather than this century.  Or is Downton Abbey spearheading an Edwardian revival?

 

 

And I’m so relieved to see a little bit of colour in this home office designed by Kendall Wilkinson, that I’ll forgive it its totally impractical and uncomfortable seating.

 

 

 

I suppose Jay Jeffers master bedroom is not too bad in a personality-free luxury hotel sort of way.  I do like the artwork above the bed and the interesting bedside lamps. Note that the turquoise bench at the foot of the bed provides a little pop of colour, but mysteriously disappears in the image below.

 

 

While the Dowager Duchess would be right at home in this guest bedroom by Suzanne Tucker. Contemporary style, really? Really?

 

 

The decorating cliches are back in force in this room for a teenage girl, with more zebras, and a brightly coloured Moroccan pouf. And I’m sorry, but covering up a stunning De Gournay wallpaper with framed pictures of RPatz has to rank as one of the worst possible decorating crimes against humanity.

 

 

So what say you?  Does this house showcase the best contemporary design in San Francisco and the US? Or is it just fugly? 

 

poll by twiigs.com

 

Pictures from Elle Decor, Casa Sugar and Merida

Go Fug Your Room? – Paola Navone

 

Oh we haven’t done one of these for ages, have we? So let’s get our bitchpants critical thinking caps on and get to work.

 

 

My first name, courtesy of my Italian mother, has always been a source of great consternation to me – as so few people in either the UK or America have any clue how to pronounce or spell it (for the record, say ‘Pow-la’ in your best Italian accent and you’ll come pretty close) and I’ve had some pretty creative versions of both over the years.

Because my name is so unusual in English-speaking countries (Paolas are ten a penny in Italy) I’ve always had a soft spot for famous Paolas such as er, Queen Paola of Belgium and Italian product designer Paola Navone.  In the latter case, it’s not just because of her illustrious name, but also because she designs some super cool stuff.

So I was very excited when September’s Livingetc featured her Milanese apartment – an old Parmesan cheese warehouse that was apparently in miserable condition until Navone recently rescued it.

 

 

The problem is that I’m not exactly thrilled by the interior design. The overlapping blues and greys, are beautiful in and of themselves, but there’s just too darn much blue everywhere and, coupled with all the hard tiling on floor and ceiling, it just looks so cold and uncomfortable, like living inside an icecube. 

That might be appropriate in Morocco, or Greece, but I’ve spent a lot of time in Milan, and in winter it is often as dank, cold and foggy as Sarah Palin’s brain.  The ceramic Moroccan stools;  smooth, shiny Moroccan pouffes and Asian ceramic busts only add to the chill. Am I the only person who wants to add some snuggly orange cushions or thick, shaggy deep red rugs to the mix?

Also, and this is probably just me, there’s just a bit too much Moroccan going on in here.  Don’t get me wrong, I love Moroccan design in and of itself and I love combining elements from an eclectic mix of cultures in a single space, as Navone mostly does to great effect. But the pasha’s boudoir above has strayed into ‘theme-bar’ territory and the Asian busts just seem incongruous and out of place.

 

 

But the real story here is the monotone colour. The blue is absolutely unrelenting, permeating every room in the apartment, though she goes wild and adds a little green to the kitchen, which, I’ll admit, I would kill several close family members to have in my house.

 

 

 

In isolation, each of these rooms is beautiful, as are many of the pieces in them. It’s just that the whole just seems so chilly and hard and the monotones are just well, monotonous.  I don’t think it’s any coincidence that the stylist had to, both literally and figuratively, turn the fire on, so as to liven up the spread.

 

 

 

poll by twiigs.com

 

You may be interested in Paola Navone’s other houses. Her Greek island home, which is a study in white,  is here and her stunning Paris apartment, which is mostly white, with pops of colour, is here.  I am obviously not remotely insanely jealous of anyone who has homes in Paris, Milan and Greece.

Go Fug Your Room – Sebastian Conran

 

Or, when designers don’t decorate.

I opened my new copy of Livingetc with some excitement as the front cover promised me an ‘at home with Sebastian Conran’.  I knew he had one of those huge Victorian wedding cake houses in Notting Hill and this would surely provide some great material for a ‘Go Love Your Room’ post.

For those of you in the US who may be unaware of them, the Conrans are pretty much design royalty in the UK.  Designer Sir Terence Conran founded the Habitat chain and the Conran Shop, has published a series of seminal works on interior design and owns a string of beautifully-designed, fabulous food-serving restaurants in London. He almost single-handedly dragged Britain out of the chintzy Fifties into the fab Sixties interiors-wise and has been a giant on the UK design scene ever since.

His children from various marriages are also successful designers and foodies in their own right – fashion designer Jasper, Notting Hill restaurateur Tom, interior designer and foodie Sophie and product designer Sebastian.

Sebastian is well-known as a product designer, probably most famously as the design brains behind Nigella Lawson’s Living Kitchen range, though as you can see from his website he has a number of great products to his credit.

 

 

 

And there’s no denying that he’s got some great STUFF.  Wink chairs, Le Corbusier lounger, antique rugs, Arco lamp, interesting art, iconic Sex Pistols  and the Clash poster artwork (designed by Conran as a student).

 

 

  

 

 

AND there’s no denying that he has, as you’d expect, paid a lot of attention to detail. The units, for example,  are painted in a colour Sebastian created from a gouache of stainless steel, “I wanted a shade that had the same tonal value as the metal to give cohesion to the mix of materials”.  A lot of remodelling has been done – hallways widened, door frames raised, huge French doors installed at the back and the sightlines adjusted to make sure the vistas through the house were perfectly aligned.

 

 

And yet, and yet, I can’t help feeling that this looks a bit like a student bedsit, with white walls, mismatched chairs, posters on the walls and rumpled rugs (albeit a student with access to a phenomenal amount of money).

Everything seems somewhat haphazard and studiously UNdecorated – no interesting curtains or cushions (except in the bedroom and you can bet they belong to the stylist), no unifying colour scheme or much colour of any description, no flashes of wit, no striking arrangements, no interesting light fixtures. It’s the home of someone who celebrates form and function over everything and as such seems both curiously sterile, strangely uncohesive and not particularly comfortable.

What do you guys think?

 

poll by twiigs.com

 

 

{All images and Sebastian Conran quotes from Livingetc August 2010}

Go Fug Your Room - Carrie and Big’s Apartment

 

Well, we all know the movie’s crap – two of the best reviews here and here –  but what did we think of the set design?  Most specifically what about Carrie and Big’s new grown-up married folks apartment?

Carrie confesses in the film that over the past year or two she’s been ‘cheating on fashion for furniture’ and she’s been working with same designer, Lydia Marks, who also revamped her apartment in the first movie.

So let’s take a tour.

One of my main bugbears with this new apartment is the colour scheme, which is basically blue and brown. I know Carrie is trying to create an environment that Big will also feel at home in, but it just makes everything seem rather dark and depressing and yet again very not Carrie. I know she’s grown up now, but where’s the fun, the liveliness, the inventiveness, the eccentricity and the bohemia?

 

 

The entrance way sets the tone for the whole, some great pieces – love the wallpaper and green glass bottle -  but just a little too fussy and cluttered and somehow old fashioned. Would Carrie really have a glass case of dead butterflies on display?

Entering the living room, I like this view of it. The Rug Company rug is beautiful, as is the coffee table, though, as in her old apartment, the sofa and chairs still seem rather more for 'perching’ than truly relaxing, though much is made in the movie of Big turning into a couch potato.  I think I like the gold painting though I can’t help thinking that Big and Carrie would have a more striking piece of modern art. 

 

 

 

 

Paul Smith got an excellent bit of product placement in here with his ‘Birdie Blossom’ cushion, which Carrie is seen cuddling like a new lover.  It’s lovely, though I’m not sure the pattern really works here, but it does seem more authentically ‘Carrie’ than much of the rest of the stuff.  It’s also great to see all the books everywhere. One of the things we all complained about last time was the lack of books in bookworm Carrie’s apartment.

 

 

From here though things go downhill faster than an Olympic skiier. This view of the sitting room is a cluttered and fussy as a pair of Queen Victoria’s bloomers.  There are just too many little pieces of furniture, too many patterns and too many little splashes of colour against horribly dark and serious walls.

 

 

This little seating area seems especially ridiculous. Are Carrie and Big really going to sit here as if they were in doctor’s waiting room taking afternoon tea? Isn’t this the perfect spot for a huge comfortable reading chair facing out towards the view?

 

 

 

I like the lighter fresher feel in the formal dining area. The Lee Jofa fabric works well and the light fitting is wonderful, though shelves could do with a bit of editing. It goes through to what I think must be the kitchen, though it seems rather impractical to cook in, and I would never, ever, EVER put a rug, however pretty, in space for cooking.  But maybe that’s just me.

 

 

Looking to the left from the entrance hall we catch a glimpse of the bedroom, with another fabulous light fitting in the small library and beautiful Cole & Son wallpaper on the bedroom walls, which echoes the paper in the hall.

 

 

Carrie makes a huge amount of fuss in this movie about Big’s purchase of a big TV for their bedroom, thus confirming a) that we were right that the big TV in Carrie’s old apartment was incongruous and out of character and b) the TV product placement people have a lot of money.

 

 

The bedroom feels a bit ‘hotelly’, but I do like the way they’ve echoed the pattern on the wallpaper with the headboard.  And below we’ve got another lovely rug/useless seating area/boring artwork situation happening.

 

 

The piece de resistance is naturally the closet, with ridiculously twee ‘his and hers’ sides.  I know people have been charmed by this conceit, but to me it looks as ludicrous as having two different his and hers sinks, one ‘feminine’ and one ‘masculine’ side by side in a bathroom. 

 

 

Not bad shoe storage though. 

 

 

(By the way Habitually Chic has put together a great post on where to source many of these pieces, including identifying the books that Carrie and Big are currently reading.)

 

So what do you think?  Additional comments hugely encouraged.

 

poll by twiigs.com

Go Fug Your Room - Meg Ryan’s Beach House

 

I opened the most recent copy of Elle Decor with some trepidation.

The front cover promised views of Meg Ryan’s Martha’s Vineyard beach house, and given what she’s managed to do to her face, I was worried what would happen if she managed to get her hands on an actual house.

 

No, not a young Joan Rivers

I was fretting needlessly though, as the house itself is very, very white,  very, very bland, the very epitome of quiet good taste, utterly devoid of personality and not at all what I was expecting.  Maybe that goofy, quirky schtick that Meg does in her movies really is acting after all?

I can see how for some people this might be a haven of peace and tranquility and the house certainly has excellent bones; but to me all the white seems absurdly unimaginative and would make me feel PROFOUNDLY uncomfortable.

 

 

 

Can you imagine trying to eat pasta with sauce in this dining room?  I would have a nervous breakdown. Though I must admit to liking the table and the overall architecture of the room. And aren’t ghostly chair covers very passe’ anyway?

 

And you can just imagine the stylist on this shoot screaming at her assistant, ‘Flowers! Leaves! Fruit! Throws! Bombay Sapphire! Just rush to the shops and get me some COLOUR, dammit!’ And you just know the stylist also brought in that metal ‘FLOWERS’ thingy, though I do like that very much.

 

 

I love the textures of these shelves and the fabulous wooden bench in the kitchen. Of course I would be terrified to actually cook in there.

 

 

So, am I being unnecessarily harsh?  I don’t hate it but it’s quite a long way from what I’d do if I had eleventy million dollars to spend on a beach house. The view’s very lovely though and has awakened a hitherto unsuspected yearning to go to Martha’s Vineyard.

 

 

So, your turn. Additional comments always welcome too.

poll by twiigs.com

 

Ha! So that bit of dynamic bloggery didn’t last long. My computer has been taken away to computer hospital to cure its severe case of  ‘fighter jet fan’  so I’m currently working off the home server which the Husband has set up for me. I didn’t even know you could do such a thing. But it’s not a terribly efficient set up, so posting may be a little light over the next few days.

In future every Tuesday will be ‘Go Fug Your Room’ day IF I can find enough subjects. If you see articles which might be good candidates for GFYR then do let me know. They need to feature decor which is at least somewhat controversial, and of course being snarky about celebrities or celebrity designers is always much more amusing than making fun of people we’ve never heard of.

Thoughts

 

 

I’m back, sort of.

I wanted to see if I missed blogging, and I did, a lot, so I’m glad to be back in the saddle. The bad news is that my computer sounds like a jet fighter just before take off and this is my last week of freedom before the Minx finishes school for the summer vacation (can you believe it?) AND we’re off to Europe in two weeks, so I probably still won’t be able to blog as frequently as I would like, but let’s see how it goes. 

In addition I have been having THOUGHTS about refocusing the blog a bit.  Which, I hear you say, won’t be difficult, since it currently has no real focus at all.

Firstly I’d like this to be more of a ‘salon’ type blog about the design-world with lots of vigorous discussion in the comments, and a bit of an antidote to the ‘bunnies and unicorns’ type of approach taken by some other blogs. So I’ll be casting around for more ‘Go Fug Your Room’ type stuff and other things for us to discuss.

Secondly, I’m getting more and more into my photography and feel that it’s taking me somewhere. I have no idea exactly where it’s going, but I’ll be using this blog to experiment more and see what happens. 

Thirdly, I’m going to introduce some more regular features so that I have a bit of a framework for my blogging week and you can come here with a bit more of an idea whether to expect tulips or chairs or knitting. I’ll be introducing some of these over the coming week.

Thanks so much for all your lovely messages and comments, I missed you!  Mwah!

In other news Seattle is ‘enjoying’ one its interminable rainy springs. I know I shouldn’t expect the fabulous Seattle summer to start until early July but all this rain in June is somewhat depressing, particularly as it seems you’re even having summer in ENGLAND this year. But the lavender is peeking out, so I’m hoping this portends of better things.

Go Fug Your Windows

Well, I was very much liking the idea of a shop window decorating competition, until I actually saw the results.

Three designers, three windows in Bloomingdales NYC, three boring as hell rooms.

First up The Urbane Traveller by Eileen Joyce for Bloomingdales.

What is it about Americans and brown interiors?  It’s something that has really struck me since I’ve been living here. In the UK brown went out with the Victorians – thank goodness as it really doesn’t work with British light – but here it still seems to be the safe colour of choice.

This so bland, so dull, and so generic that words fail me. Except to wonder why a ‘sophisticated travel magazine editor’ would want to have two highly impractical stone orbs on her highly impractical coffee table.  Let me know if you see anything interesting in this snoozefest because it’s eluding me.

Next up The Writer’s Romantic Supper, by Maxwell Gillingham-Ryan for Apartment Therapy.

This is where I destroy all my (fortunately nonexistent) chances of winning a ‘Homie’ next year.

It is criminal, yes, criminal, what Maxwell G-R, whose taste I normally quite like, has done to that absolutely gorgeous Neisha Crosland paper (speaking of which, we used to stock Neisha Crosland accessories in the shop and we must get some more in). 

He has totally ignored all the very wise advice on feature walls you give below – covering it up with two truly horrible portraits, overwhelming it with an astonishing amount of fuss and clutter and turning the whole into some dingy Victorian drawing room, complete with a quite spectacularly horrible repro armchair.  I know M G-R said he was going for a ‘steampunk-y’ vibe but honestly it’s because of rooms like his that minimalism was ever invented. And if my beau turned out to have an apartment like that I would feel too agitated and uncomfortable for any ‘romance’.

And finally we have The Modern Woman by our old friend Eddie Ross. 

And, much as it pains me to say it, I like this window by far the best of the three, though that’s not to say that I actually like it. But at least we can be grateful to him for avoiding brown.

It’s a more modern style than we’ve seen from him before and I really like what he’s done with the cushions, (except for the Miles Redd-ish faux leopard skin), colours and artwork, though the paint speckled walls and everything else leaves me pretty cold.

And of course he has to include his signature Kelly Wearstler–esque bust which seems to follow him around everywhere (see the link above for his house in Lonny magazine). Somewhat unnervingly the muse for this room is described as a ‘media mogul and mother of two’ and yes, every mother I know would just love to have half a hundredweight of statuary teetering on a precarious pedestal with kids around. It’s a lawsuit waiting to happen. Do young gay interior decorators actually ever meet kids?

Anyway, I was too bored/disappointed to bother voting, but if you’re inspired, full details of all three rooms are here. Do you like them?

Go Fug Your Room – Miles Redd Again

 

Our old friend, uber-hyped US interior decorator Miles Redd apparently designed this Manhattan apartment for a young couple with kids. And yes, the love children of Marie Antoinette and Santa would probably feel quite at home here.

Miles, honey, there are, however, a few things I feel I need to point out.

a) Just because your surname is ‘Redd’, it doesn’t mean that firetruck red is necessarily the most calming or even attractive colour for interiors.  And believe me, interiors containing kids need calming.

 

b) I know you’re American, but that still doesn’t make firetruck red, cobalt blue and stark white a particularly appealing colour palette.  Or were eyepopping primary colours your one concession to the ‘kids’ thing?

c) I know you can’t be expected to know much about kids, but surely even a young gay man about town knows that lots of tchotchkes/knickknacks + silk upholstery and curtains + felt wall coverings does not an entirely kid-friendly environment make. I suspect they have a very ferocious nanny.

Good to see that Miles hasn’t yet given up on hideous animal pictures

d) Have you realised yet that it’s the 21st century? The only thing that isn’t either an antique or some dreadful piece of repro is the kid’s Ikea bed.

Nice Ikea bed. Actually this room isn’t that bad.

I like the walls and colour palette in here. It’s all a bit granny’s old bloomers though.

No, you can’t even escape the red by going to the bathroom. And no Miles hasn’t given up on whimsical animal prints either.  But I do quite like the wallpaper.

Miles takes the American obsession with table lamps to new heights by incorporating them in the kitchen. This is the nicest room in the house though.

Elle Decor US calls the apartment an ‘ode to 30s elegance’.  I have noticed that in a US decorating context ‘elegant’ does not signify ‘quiet, spare, refined beauty in an Audrey Hepburnesque way’ as I used to think of it in the UK.  Instead, it is code for ‘we added as many frills and furbelows and trims and ornaments and shiny things and golden bits and things we think might look French as we possibly could before the credit card exploded’.

What do you all think?

poll by twiigs.com

Go Love Your Room? Jean-Christophe Aumas

 

I’m genuinely torn about this apartment which I found in last month’s Elle Deco – UK (yep, I’m only now getting the chance to go through my Christmas magazines, so look out for lots of ideas for Christmas decorating and table settings etc in the coming weeks). The apartment belongs to French art director Jean-Christophe Aumas, who creates window displays and events for big names such as John Galliano, Chloe and Diptyque.

 

At first I didn’t really like very much – the colour scheme, all baby pink, acid lemon, teal, black and grey and red seemed incoherent and unpleasant and the whole thing felt somewhat bitty, disjointed and just plain messy.

But the more I looked, the more quirky, fascinating details I saw.  I love the way he plays with and echoes geometric shapes,

the blocks of colour, the way he hangs his pictures and sets his tables on an angle to reflect the diagonals in the herring bone flooring,  the interesting objects such as the domes on the mantelpiece, the light fittings, the three triangles painted where the wall meets the ceiling, the turquoise shower, the brightly coloured accessories.

 

I wouldn’t necessarily want to live here, but I’d love to visit and look around and pick up the objects and ask where they all come from. It’s interesting and fascinating and quirky, and for that I forgive it much.

What do you think?

poll by twiigs.com

 

By the way, this has reminded me how much I love the Alexander Girard wooden dolls.

 

If only they didn’t cost $160 EACH.  Or a mere $1,600 for all eleven. Ha ha ha.  If you’re feeling disgustingly rich, then go buy them here.

 

 

 

Vancouver and Visas and Wearstler and Wanders

Can you believe it’s been three years since we first got our visas for the US?

When we first came out to Seattle we assumed that definitely be back in the UK before our visas ran out. But here we are three years later, happily settled and with no return to Europe in prospect, needing new visas.  You have to leave the country to get them renewed so we’ve driven 150 miles up the freeway to spend a few days in Vancouver. 

Here are a few pics from a gorgeous autumnal walk we went on yesterday in Stanley Park.

And here are a couple of links which might be of interest until I’m back properly in front of a computer (on Friday).

First up Alexandra from A Bit Late is not impressed with Kelly Wearstler’s beach house. While I don’t think I hate it as much as her previous effort (she appears to have given up raiding the British Museum) I’m not sure it has a huge amount to commend it.  I haven’t yet seen the Metropolitan Home feature though.

Also our friend Marcel Wanders has apparently designed a range of Christmas decorations for Target here in the US.  I had high hopes for these as he’s done good stuff before for Habitat in the UK but really, with the exception of the big red, white and silver column candles which I may have to acquire, he was phoning this in without even bothering to switch on the phone. BO-RING.

Go Love Your Room? – Lulu Guinness

I’m a little bit on the fence about this one, as it’s a little too romantically girly for my taste, but there’s still a lot to love in Lulu Guinness’ Notting Hill house.

Love the refreshing colours, but there’s too much spindly furniture – which never looks comfortable and wallow-y

 

My least favourite room in the house.  I love her bags, but I’m not a fan of LG’s bedding (it’s from her homewares range) and the mural commissioned from an art student doesn’t redeem things much. And I do wonder who dusts that collection of powder compacts.

First up the bones of the house are superb – the Victorian houses built in Notting Hill are larger and grander than in other parts of London, so the proportions are generally, as in this case, more splendid.

And there’s something about the quality of the light there, I lived in Notting Hill for twelve years and even on gloomy days it always seemed brighter and lighter than the rest of London – something to do with the white coloured houses and the sunset views to the west.  But maybe it was just because I loved living there so much.

But I digress.

I love the eclecticism of the decor, the bold use of colour, the collections of objects which are clearly much loved and personal and the way the whole thing reflects LG’s own quirky feminine but slightly kitsch style. (Is she well known in the US? I haven’t come across her here.  In the UK she is renowned as a handbag designer, but she also designs homewares.)

 

I ADORE the pearly queen wallhanging and her tchotchkes (one of my favourite American words) are mostly fab though wonder how practical it is to have everything lined up behind the banquette like that.

The other interesting aspect is how the house has evolved since it was last photographed in 2001 (seen here on Hidden in France) – LG has kept many of the same pieces but the style is a little more pared down and the colour palette more restrained, with much more use of white.  It’s so refreshing to see a wealthy person who doesn’t throw everything out and start again every few years, but who keeps their house full of familiar, much-loved  treasures.

 

Kitchen 2009

Kitchen 2001

Just loving all the perspex and the black and white

 

I’ve always loved her trademark perfume bottles

What do you think? {All images, by the way, from Living etc}

Go Fug Your Room – Kelly Wearstler AGAIN

Really my dears, she makes it all too easy.

I know we’ve been through all this before, but Ms W has a new book to promote, so therefore pics of the interior of yet another Hollywood home are doing the rounds (does she actually live in any of these houses?) and it’s the FUGLIEST yet!  Quelle joie!

Ths sad thing is that from the exterior this is a beautiful LA house with a stunning pool, but now you couldn’t pay me to live amongst all this cold, hard, ersatz splendour. Money truly is wasted on some people.

Can anyone explain what I’m missing about this woman?  I would genuinely love to know – at the moment it just looks to me like the Empress has new clothes.

No, she didn’t let her boys scribble on the walls, apparently this is custom-made graffiti-inspired wallpaper. Which is not to say that the boys wouldn’t have done a better job.

Like living in the British Museum, and about as comfortable.

Doesn’t it strike you as a little inconvenient to have to move half a hundredweight of assorted replica statuary every time you want to lay the table?

This is apparently Kelly’s study – such a practical place for a working designer n’est-ce pas? And those chairs would seriously freak me out.

Two further questions strike me. 

- With the zebra skins and the faux decapitated heads, is Kelly channelling Eddie or could Eddie be channelling Kelly? (Though why either of them would wish to is beyond me.)

- And how on earth does a colour scheme of dark blue and dirty brass with some pink scribbles qualify one to write a book about colour (the subject of Kelly’s next magnum opus)?

Oh and for those of you in the UK and elsewhere, Kelly Wearstler is one of the most famous interior decorators in the US.  I kid you not.

Go Fug Your Magazine - Lonny Mag

As you know I was never a big fan of Domino -  I’m becoming more American every day, but nothing has come remotely close to replacing the British shelter magazines such as Living etc and Elle Deco in my heart – but I was looking forward to the launch of Lonny, the online magazine brainchild of former Domino Market Editor Michelle Adams and photographer Patrick Cline.

Issue 1 was launched today and I’m afraid you’ll just have to colour me rather disappointed.

First the good news.

- The online reader tool is fantastic – clear, fast and making it very easy to flip between the pages (though it seems strangely old-fashioned to just duplicate a print magazine online – if you can add hyperlinks, for example on the shopping pages, why not just do it?)

- The photographs are aces.

- The styling, though completely not to my taste, is generally excellent.

- There’s lots to read, with plenty of home tours and not too many ads.

The bad news, unfortunately, is that the whole magazine is a celebration of the fussy, over-ornate, grandma’s old knickers style that dominates American interiors magazines and which I’m sure led partially to Domino’s demise.

The front cover is spectacularly meh. I know it doesn’t have to stand out on a newstand, but really couldn’t they do better than this?  If the cover of a magazine is supposed to tell you what a magazine is all about then this says is ‘fussy’ and ‘mumsy’ (do Americans understand what this means? Should I be writing ‘momsy’ instead?), which is not a decorating style I aspire to.

Inside the layout is full of the multiple fancy fonts, strange dotty lines and fussy boxes which we’ve discussed before about American magazines, though it is less busy and better organized that some.

The shopping pages feature some quite spectacularly ugly stuff.

 

The fashion pages are EXECRABLE. I have no words.

And there of course are loads of rooms cluttered with overdecorated repro furniture and table lamps in every direction (what is it with Americans and table lamps?)

Regardez

Table lamps outside? Seriously you guys are OBSESSED.

The one more modern home featured is about as imaginative as a Crate & Barrel catalogue

Even the home of Grace Bonney from Design*Sponge, whose taste I normally quite like, is made to look dull.

Finally our old friend Eddie Ross is back with his special brand of granny style, featuring even more zebra than he had in his New York apartment and a ton of fuss and clutter on every surface (a shame as the bare bones of his country house look absolutely amazing).

The very best news though is that we now have a great new source of ‘Go Fug Your Room’ fodder.  I thereforewish Lonny Magazine many, MANY years of success.

And now, having offended most of the American online decorating establishment, I will go and do some real work.

Alexander McQueen’s (Ex) East London Home

As you know around here we’re rather partial to a peek at fashion designers’ houses (we’re looking at you Matthew Williamson, Betsey Johnson and Vanessa Bruno), so here for your delectation and delight are pictures of Alexander McQueen’s East London townhouse. {From the Real Estalker via the HolyMoly mailout – yes I do read it}

I don’t think it’s fair to make this a ‘Go Fug Your Room’ candidate as these photos are only estate agent’s photos and don’t fully reflect McQueen’s personal style, but it’s still interesting to snoop.

Personally I’m finding this rather boring.  As you may have guessed I’m not hugely into minimalism at the best of times, but this strikes me as rather boring minimalism. My main gripe is with all the square and boxy built-ins – I prefer a few elegant curves in my rooms.  And that house looks as if it dates from the 1850s? so it probably had quite a few nice original features – ceiling mouldings, fireplaces etc -  which have all been summarily destroyed.

I also have to say that this house could benefit hugely from a bit of American-style home staging – some pictures, maybe a rug and a funky chair here and there would make all the difference.

I am loving the roof deck (though for me the glass skylight directly above the bed is not exactly a selling point), the pond thingy (pool?) and what we can see of the outside spaces though. Here the minimalist lines are softened by the plants, though a few flowers wouldn’t go amiss.

Anyway, if this house is for you it will only set you back 1.7 million pounds (I’ve just got a new computer and now have no idea how to find a pound sign) or around $2.8 million.  Please bear in mind though, that this house is in Hackney, one of the, shall we say, edgiest areas of inner London.

Go Fug Your Room

This is why I won't miss Domino.

For some reason they decided, at the tail end of last year, to give a feature to Eddie Ross, a former Martha Stewart Living editor and very-full-of-himself losing contestant on Top Design who seems to be trying to set himself up as some sort of lifestyle guru.

Now Eddie, if you're reading, I'm sure these are all carefully collected and treasured antique pieces and there's not a SINGLE PIECE of repro in amongst all this clutter, but where is your flair and imagination?  Where are the quirky, original pieces; the unexpected combinations; the touches of wit and personality? And why on earth is everything so fussy and maiden-auntish?  You're only about 30 I believe but there's not a single thing here that suggests you have had any contact with this century whatsoever.

I say this with love, but piling antiques onto every available surface in a vaguely symmetrical fashion does NOT good design make; Canada Dry bottles and huge rolls of brown paper are not very decorative and I can't believe you're still using zebra.  And Domino, I can't believe you thought this was worth showing to us.

I do, however, very much like the colour of the wall around the fireplace.

   

No poll today.  I'd just like the answers to two questions.

1) If you're a young, happening guy about town, why would you feel the need to decorate your house as if you were Martha Stewart's GRANNY?

2) When is America going to join the rest of the world in the 20th (never mind the 21st) century and give up its love affair with fuss, clutter and ornamentation? This is a young, vibrant, dynamic country and yet I see so many rooms in magazines and blogs where Queen Victoria would feel right at home. Is it because you just all love dusting?

UPDATE: There's a discussion going on in the 'Comments' as to why Domino is going to be so missed. Can anyone who will sincerely miss Domino explain why?  And was it really better in the good old days?

Go Fug Your Room? Matthew Williamson's London House

I've put a question mark here as I actually rather like the very funky, very London, house belonging to British fashion designer Matthew Williamson, which has been featured in both September's Domino and now in January's Elle Deco UK.  However I can understand if it's not exactly other people's cup of tea and would love to know what you think.

Personally I love the way he mixes old and new, ethnic sensibilities, colours and patterns and the whole seems very much a reflection of his personality.

I'm not saying I would choose to live here - I'm not convinced I could cope with mirrored armchairs, spinal cord wallpaper, that bright a colour scheme and all the Indian stuff doesn't do much for me - but in the end this is a very personal space, doesn't feel 'try hard' unlike the Miles Redd space below and contains quite a lot of stuff I absolutely adore. It's probably closest in feel to the Betsey Johson apartment we critiqued pulled apart earlier this year, though it seems much less cluttered and the colour scheme isn't so execrable.

First up the two covers of the magazines provide an interesting Britain v America moment as both publications use exactly the same corner of the dining area on their covers. 

Elle Deco's styling of the room is much less cluttered - no cushion on the chair, nothing on the tulip table, no globe in the corner and less junk on the console under the mirror. The chandelier also seems to have 'disappeared'. I like the pretty boxes they've added on the console and the Fornasetti plate over the mirror is inspired.    Interestingly though, Elle Deco has put Williamson on the cover, which they hardly ever do, whereas Domino, which is usually no stranger to cheesey celeb shots for once doesn't have a person at all.  Note that Elle Deco has made the room seem far less 'white' by punching up the colour, having the coloured wall reflect in the mirror, cropping away from the white window and er, 'painting' the ceiling. Which cover do you prefer?

{Images from Elle Deco} 

Funnily enough the globe and the table dolly return when Elle Deco shows some interior shots, suggesting that Domino stuck with the original styling. I quite like that Designer's Guild wallpaper and am a sucker for white vinyl floors. And I love the mix of the Eames chairs, the tulip table and that fabulous peacock chair. The mirror is a bit baroque for my taste, but has a nostalgia factor for me as it was apparently bought on the Golborne Road, just round the corner from where I used to live in Notting Hill.

  

I love what he's done with this sofa. That is all. Curtain treatment is strangely boring though.

{Above images from Domino}

Mirrored armchair does NOT look cosy.  Still loving the white vinyl floor.  Love the windows and orange paint, not sure about the mirror mosaic fireplace, don't like the mirror, though I see what he's trying to do. Those books sure move around a lot.

Light installation in the stairwell.  Best thing in the house.  As Rachel Zoe would say, I die.

Fuchsia pink kitchen bar area.  Personally wouldn't have done it quite such a girly colour. But still rather fabulous.

Ha ha!  You can tell we're in London from the pokey bathroom. Thought Venetian mirrors with modern had been done to death by now, but like the collage on the wall. I used to do things like that in my teens.  Haven't we see these vases before?

Lovely floral wallpaper in bedroom.  Except it's not a floral.  Wallpaper design is made up of spinal cords and ribs.  I love the effect, but am far too squeamish to have this in a bedroom.

Go Fug Your Room - Miles Redd

Or, Miles Redd - WTF? So, another super fashionable decorator with whom Americans seem to be incredibly enamoured is Miles Redd.  Domino describes him as the sultan of swank and his work is variously described as luxe, opulent, elegant, sumptuous, chic and glamorous, which all appear to be euphemisms for cluttered, ugly, muddled and like a dowager duchess on speed.

Like our dear friend Kelly Wearstler, he is another designer that I just do. not. get.  So, in the words of Rachel Maddow, I need you to 'talk me down'. Tell me just what it is that makes this guy so amazing and so worshipped.

Here are pics of his latest photoshoot in Domino.

{All photos by Paul Costello from the Domino website} 

I'm sorry, but this is ugly. The colour scheme of beige, grey, plum, pale blue, forest green and red is incoherent, dull and generally bleurgh and I don't like the over-emphasized symmetry; those lamps are pretty, but look all wrong here, and I'm really not keen on the arrangement of pictures of wall, which for some reason puts me in mind of space invaders.

 

{Photo by Paul Costello from Domino magazine}

I had to scan this picture in from the magazine as it wasn't on the Domino website, so you could see the far end of the room in all its ugly glory.  That picture is HIDEOUS, surely?  And I just find all the beige, grey and forest green deeply depressing; and no, it's not jazzed up by the 'witty' animal skin cushions, which just look try-hard and out of place here.

Inoffensive, dull, more 'witty' animal print, like a bad hotel bedroom.  Move on, there's nothing to see here.

Well I suppose this is better. Not so cluttered with junk and I quite like the colours, though I'm not entirely sure about shiny red patent leather in a bedroom context (or in any context aside from little girls' party shoes). The lamp and bedside table arrangement is OK though.

I like this kitchen as a concept. I'm not sure I'd like it so much in the early morning while fumbling for a cup of coffee with a hangover, or indeed if I was actually going to attempt some cooking.  The coffee maker is aces though.

 

And here's the man himself.  The Husband walked past my computer as I was pulling these pictures together and said 'he looks like a twat'.  Well, quite.  (I believe the North American equivalent of twat is 'douchebag', which is one of my all time favourite Americanisms).

 

Go Fug Your Room (and Yourself) - Kelly Wearstler

Or, Kelly Wearstler - WTF?

I know that American design sensibilities are different from European ones.  Americans seem to like more fuss, clutter and ornamentation than Europeans are used to. I think this is because minimalism was a European thing and its philosophy of clean lines, simple shapes and less clutter seems to have permeated our culture a lot more, even if we wouldn't consider ourselves minimalists.

Having said all that, I just can't understand the American adoration of interior designer Kelly Wearstler.  An ex-topless model, champion of Hollywood Regency style, author of many books, and judge on interior design reality pogramme Top Design, she's probably the equivalent in status to a Kelly Hoppen or Tricia Guild in the UK (though with very different design sensibilities) and very much admired.

But I. just. don't. get. it.

Here are pictures from her recent spread in Domino magazine.  Am I really the only person who thinks this looks like a wealthy Arab just ran amok in an early 80s motel? (With apologies to all wealthy Arabs with taste). Isn't all the gold and shiny stuff and horrendous layered pattern and blocks of marble and overstuffed leather and fussy knickknackery just, well, hideous?  Can someone please explain what I'm missing here?

 

 

All images from Domino 

By the way, these are the ways she chooses to wear her hair, in public, nay, even on telly.  There doesn't appear to be any coercion involved. Thank goodness she's beautiful.

 

Image from www.tomandlorenzo.blogspot.com (the amazing Project Rungay boys also blog Top Design).

 

Go Fug Your Room - Betsey Johnson

This next room should please the 84% of you who thought that the Kelly Hoppen-designed room was too bland and soulless and lacking in colour and nicknackery (which begs the question how on earth is Kelly H so successful?).

US fashion designer Betsey Johnson's maximalist apartment was featured in last August's UK Elle Deco and has since garnered a surprisingly positive reaction around blogland.

I have no real idea who she is, beyond what I've read on Wikipedia though I did like what I saw of her last collection.  She looks like she's trying to be 'zany' in a Zandra Rhodes-ish sort of way and 'more is more' is definitely her byword, when it comes to home furnishings at least.

 

I do like the mix of romantic French and vintage mid-century pieces and love the idea of accenting pink with yellow, but surely this is TOO pink? It's not even a tasteful pink but bubblegum pink.  Mixed with fuschia.  With a pink shag carpet.

And am I the only person feeling sorry for the person who does the dusting? And who is getting mightily bored with Arco lamps? (Though I presume Betsey might have acquired hers from Andy Warhol rather than Ebay).

Is this room fugly?

TOO pink is not a concept I am familiar with. I love it!
I love the furniture, but yes, it might be a teensy bit too pink.
It would be fab if you threw out half the stuff and painted the walls.
If I look at all this girliness much longer, I'm going to give birth.
I need to lie down in a sterile white box. It's fugtacular!

> View Results
PollDaddy.com

Go Fug Your Room - Kelly Hoppen

With apologies to the Fug girls.

I have been discussing with Elaine from my new BFF blog Decorno the importance of having opinions, of which she has many very forthright ones.

As a cynical Brit I do find the 'hearts and puppies' stuff you find on some other blogs a bit difficult to cope with, so I've been thinking for some time of doing a 'rooms I hate' series on here.  Though I was gutted to find that Elaine already does this (and much better), if you want more snark.

But I digress. Today's room is from the doyenne of British interior design Kelly Hoppen.  Ms Hoppen has built an empire on designing rooms for people with so little personality that even colour is considered to be freakishly avant garde.  She has even produced a range of beige paint. Her rooms shriek 'good taste' so loudly that they end up having not much taste at all.

 

This example from Homes and Gardens is apparently part of a new London house built for an American client.

I have to say that I do like how she plays with different textures within the neutral palette, and her signature black wenge floors and the subtle pleated pelmets at the top of the curtains which work in a room this big and imposing.

But everything, from the immense table, to the huge black armoire and the heavily bevelled mirror is just so stolid; and a room without colour would drive me me mad in about thirty seconds (just one little hot pink flower arrangement somewhere PLEASE); and I hate that this is a brand new house but filled with repro details; and the way the knick knacks have clearly been bought in by the yard and there's not a single thing in here that is treasured or has history. And most of all I hate that the chairs are wearing dresses.

Didn't chair dresses go out in the 80s?  Weren't they just things in 'Ideas for Soft Furnishings' books that no one ever made?  Or if you did make them it was to disguise the fact that your chairs were all mismatched and rickety and came from a junk shop?  Which I hardly think is the problem here, since the table apparently costs upwards of £50,000. And the wonky seam on that chair with its back to us is driving me nuts.

What do you all think?  Get dissing discussing in the comments.